Depict

Autumn Tree
Winter Tree

Did this a while ago, oldest daughter did the coloring of the lower popcorn. It is actually the same popcorn from different angels.

This is a kitchen towel that grandmother Elisabeth wove. She made a bunch of course and they are now spread in the family, I have two of them I think. I love them!

Decided to try on the stairs of our home. Bribed the four-year-old to be my model yesterday. First I sketched the stars and the flower and then her three times on a different paper. Then today I put them together on another drawing paper and suddenly decided to give it some color. I don’t know why I didn’t took watercolor paper before I started.

This is something to open nuts with, made of wood by a man in the village Adak (Sweden) his name was Sven Öhman. I keep her and her older sister with our Christmas-stuff and it is so nice to unpack them every year.

This is a really tiny tree on our tiny yard. It is not bigger than the one year old. Maybe just a bit. Is it a tree.. No leaf left on the tree but one on the ground.

I have a new computer and it is a big big difference when I scan/rotate/scale things.. It takes almost no time at all. I love it!

The chicken-run next to my future home.

Pen, watercolor and white ink.
I have some struggles in my life. I try to work with them and grow from them but it is hard.

I want to be able to label myself as an artist. I often find myself saying things like “If I was an artist, I would do this and that..”. Even now when I have decided to call myself Artist I easy add something after that explains that I’m not or something that makes it obvious that I am telling a joke. I guess that I’m not the only one who goes trough this, but I wish I did when I was fifteen instead and that I had already got the habit of being one. Maria the Artist!

It goes deeper than just the label. I avoid things artistic.
It is almost impossible for me to leave comment on other artblogs. I blush and feel uncomfortable when I get recognition, even if I do want to share and show.

I have a hard time to walk in to an art store and buy things I dream of because of this fear that they will laugh at me and point me in the direction of the nearest toy store.

I want to be someone who goes to the museum and is recognized in the gallery but I’m to afraid. Over and over again I have decided to go to different exhibitions before it opens and then it totally slips my mind until the day after it has been closed again.

I have this old shirt that I had when I did some oil painting twenty years ago. when I try to go trough my stuff in my closet I end up with that shirt in my hands. I always decide to keep it to use when painting and right after the decision I always put it in again, way back in the closet beneath everything and completely forget about it until next time.

My aunt told me that my grandmother loved chocolate and sometimes bought a bar of chocolate to herself, took a bite and immediately throw it on the top shelf of the cupboard. In her opinion it was so good taste that it probably sinful to eat it. I have no memories of her and chocolate, but I have tons of memories including other types of candy and pastries. I recognize this in myself. It is so hard for me to do arty stuff and to really make an effort to grow as an artist. I easily take interest in other things. I am a quick learner and I have been working with so many different things. But when people have been asking me of plans for the future I couldn’t say anything. No dreams or goals. But I have a dream, I know that now, but my subconscious just keeps throwing it to the top shelf so I won’t take it for myself.

I need to take it down and enjoy it instead. I can have good things!

This week we found a place that we are going to move to in September. It is so nice and feels so right and it also is something that I have not been able to picture myself in earlier. A lovely pretty home, a place for an Artist. This time I will put a hook beside my drawing area just for the shirt. But I really can’t picture me introducing myself to the new neighbors as an artist. But I have some months to practice!

Please feel free to leave comments. I want to! I just need to accept that I can enyoj them.

Oh, and I would like to share a pic of the porch to be.

I like dandelions.
I don’t have a garden.
I like yellow.
I like the way the seeds fly.
I don’t have a garden.

This is a food shed built between some rocks in the garden from the previous entry. I would like to take some more time sometime and paint it again because it is really pretty.